on my year of yes (aka happy new year)

2017 is the year I turn 30. Because of this, it's also the year I want to do shit. I don't do well with resolutions, but this year I'm going to try, and this year, my resolution is to say yes. 

This, for me, doesn't mean jumping blindly into every opportunity, or doing things I don't actually want to do just to do them. For me, it is putting myself out there with the intention of bettering myself, and hopefully those around me. It's saying yes to learning, growing, exploring. Saying yes to taking that trip I've been considering. Saying yes to breaking out of my comfort zone. Saying yes to staying at home when I'd rather not go out. Saying yes to taking care of myself before others. Saying yes to the stranger that asks for help on the subway. Saying yes to new opportunities for friends, travel, love. Saying yes to living the best life for me.

I realized last year that a lot of the decisions i was making were for other people. Typically stemming around what other people expected me to do and wanted me to do, i wasn't always putting myself and my wants and my needs first. Which is fine. There are times in life that others do need to come first, and I will say yes to those times often and with pleasure. But this year I'm dedicating to me. 

It took me 11 intense weekends of yoga teacher training to realize that much of my happiness in recent years was feigned or fleeting. Superficial. Things were good. I've been blessed with good jobs in an industry I enjoy. Blessed with great friends, a loving family, a healthy body. But it took those 11 weekends to realize I needed something more. To be challenged, tested, forced out of my comfort zone. That's when the superficial happy turned into real happy. Happy through fulfillment, positive energy, endless learning about myself and my spirituality (and what that even means). Happy through challenging my body and mind, pushing my limits, and learning that there are, actually, limits, and that that's ok.  

So this year, I'm saying yes. I'm resolving to continue to challenge myself, to be uncomfortable, to take care of others, but to also take care of me. I'm resolving to love more, smile more, be more present. To work my ass of fighting for what I believe in, but to be patient and respectful and to educate myself at the same time. To get involved. To hope and to dream, but to also stay grounded and humble. To say yes to all of these things, and to say yes to knowing when no is okay too.  

Happy New Year everyone. May your 2017 be blessed with love, laughter, friends, family, and a whole lot of happy.